Lately I have been energetically hounded by two V words: Victim and Value.  

 

For many years I blamed being adopted for my DNA makeup. My eyes are brown…because I am adopted. I react like that…because I am adopted. I attract people like that…because I am adopted. I am not financial responsible…because I am adopted. I am not worthy…because I am adopted. Constantly pointing the index finger at adoption as the curse and not looking at the 3 fingers of victim-hood pointing right back at me.

 

The dictionary describes “victim” as: a person who is deceived or cheated, as by his or her own emotions or ignorance. Um...ouch.

 

“If you allow someone to kick you to the curb or otherwise diminish you, you need to stop allowing yourself to be a victim.” So said my horoscope for January 2008. That person kicking me to the curb was me.

 

Well then, here I am…Ms. Victim. Now that I am aware of this Victim thing…what do I do now? Well, here is where the other V word comes into play: VALUE. 

 

What is my value as a person? How do I value myself? If I have been playing a victim for so many years…then the obvious answer is - I don’t place much value on myself. What a bummer, dude. 

 

History and the media show us that we value our material possessions more than we value our own self. It is much easier to put our energy into loving our items or the wrong person more than our self because it is comfortable. Loving or valuing our self means we have to step out of that comfort zone and take a look at things we might not want to see. 

 

What would happen if all your possessions where taken away one day? All you had were the clothes on your back and the shoes on your feet. Now you are in the uncomfortable. All you have is you. What do you value now? Health? Well being? Life? What about laughter through adversity? What about strength? 

 

All of a sudden you find yourself looking in the mirror of discovery and change. The rug has been pulled out from under your feet and now you have a chance to do things differently. Do you choose change? Or, do you go back to the sad, unhappy life of material existence? 

 

“This happened to me and I will never be the same”… [insert victim here].

 

You’re right! You will never be the same. And how cool is that! Instead of choosing the side of victim…discover what truly matters within you. Your core values! Love, trust, integrity, faith, inspiration, motivation, truth, happiness, health, courage, compassion, creativity, balance…

 

Who must you be in order to live these values? What must you refuse to think, do, or be in order to live these values? Who do you need to be more of to create your new life? Who do you need to be more of in order to get where you need to be?

 

You don’t have to have the rug pulled out from underneath you in order to activate change…you have that choice and that power now. It just takes one conscious decision and one step at a time.

 

Are you going to be the Victor in your life? Or the Victim? Are you going to create Values that honor your life and why you are here? Or are you going to go buy a new expensive fun toy, car, house, dog, dress, or enter an unhealthy, undeserving relationship? 

 

Your choice….your life. How are you choosing to live it? And are you truly happy with the way things are right now?!

 

Rock on! Be real.